Asking for it?

To a large extent I believe that we create our own realities, and that we subconsciously choose the paths we walk, perhaps for the purpose of growing, or learning something. I believe, as posited by the Hindu philosophy, that as our souls come onto earth, they are perfect and a part of God, the overall Universe. With socialization and experience, our souls get surrounded with "stuff" that covers our core, which is inherently good. But it's this "stuff" that others mostly see, and so it can be easy to not see the good core.

I like, for the most part, the person I am. My experiences and challenges have made me the person I am now, so to a large degree I am grateful for my experiences even though much of my childhood was scary and stressful. It has taught me how to love, what's important in life, how to be independent, and how to be motivated to reach my goals.

But I am also a big victim advocate. So what I am struggling with is that if I, on some level, chose my childhood experience of abuse, was I "asking for it?" Did my soul purposefully choose my parents and my experiences? Because in our material world, I do not at all believe that abuse victims ask to be abused. How do I reconcile this?